Friday, February 27, 2009

Good ol' days..........

He found himself immobile for hours sitting in the room, relieving every single memory that he had shared with her. He spent most of that time thinking about every argument they’d had, wishing he could take them back, wishing he could take back every horrible word he had ever said to her. He prayed that she had known his words had only been spoken in anger and they had not reflected his true feelings. He tortured himself for the times he had acted selfish, going out with his friends for the time when he was mad at her instead of staying with her. He chastised herself for walking away from her when he should have hugged her, when he held grudges for days instead of forgiving her. He wanted to take back every moment he knew she had been so angry with him and hated him. He wished all her memories were of the good times but the bad times kept coming back to haunt him.

Lizard fucking NRIs

I watched Slumdog
I read White Tiger

One won Oscars and other Booker.

My views: fuck these fucking NRI writers. These assholes don’t know anything about India. These fuckers still lives in the illusion of ‘poor India, hungry India’ or rather they are smart enough since they know glorification of Indian poverty is widely acclaimed and accepted. I don’t have anything against Boyle I m just after the cock suckers like Aravind Adiga and Vikas swarup (writers of white tiger and Q&A respectively).

All these writers have been living outside the country nearly all their life. They don’t even know what the real problems are. I have my problems with country but I know they will be sorted out with time. All these shitholes looks towards west, look in the sky and give a sigh about India. You all fucking morons, stop giving these fucking sighs when you are not even the part of this system. I know we were a little late to start but when we started we were bang on target and we are going at great pace now too. These fuckers should realize everything takes time to improve, everything has to pay their dues and we are paying for our late start but nevertheless we are paying the debt with double installments.

Anyways I sincerely appreciate their efforts for the lengths they have gone digging deep down their asses, searching all the shit they can and then placing it gracefully in hardbound cover. I recommend some more awards should be given to them like vikas should be buttfucked by a black guy and insert a duplicate ‘Made in china’ Dildo inside aravind. The last words for you my dear friends (as you put it in your novels): sisterfucker, mothersucker, assholes, lizard fuckers, cockroach penis suckers…

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Gen fart !

The McCain VP selection team presented McCain with three options. Tom Ridge, Mitt Romney and Sarah Palin. They presented a detailed profile on each of them and deliberated pros and cons for hours. Then they said, “Senator McCain, make your pick.” McCain said, “MILF”. That’s the only way to explain McCain’s VP choice.

Folks at Purdue University have been working on an invisibility cloak. They are now saying it will take a while for them to “finish” it. But we suspect they actually made one but can’t find where it is.

Em an a’sole (Now and Then)

Till my high school:
1)I used to have doubts about whether we humans, live inside the earth ie the inner surface of sphere or the outer surface of sphere.
2)I was always amazed by the fact that how the hell is this planet hung in space….there is no thread or support…clearly Newton’s apple was unknown to me
3)Sex: I used to have loads of creepy ideas for that. I wish I could share but half my family reads my blog. Anyways I will share one. My first porn was the song ‘pehle nasha’. In that song when pooja bedi did that marlin Monroe level skirt fleeing act…Oh Gosh!! I used to sneak out and use to play that song on VCr again and again.
4)I always used to think that Mahabharta which is coming on television is really going somewhere and we are watching live telecast.
5)I was always fascinated by superman. I used to think that his flying power came from the Cape he wears. I used to put my towel as cape and even tried jumping off from boundary wall. Luckily I never tried roof top [:)]

Till today I believe
1)One day I will get some superpower.
2)My PJ’s are good.
3)The life which I am spending right now is a dream and someday I will wake up and I will see my totally different real life.
4)Time Travel will be possible.

TOW the wildest Ambitions

My 3 wildest ambition in life:
1) I want to write Books.
2) i want to be a director making movies on these books
3) I want to do threesome.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Last Touch

She was finally able to make up her mind to visit him. Actually, last week she met a common friend and got the news of his accident.

She entered the ICU room. He was lying there. He was in coma but she realized there was still, a smile on his face. The same smile which used to drive her crazy once and still has the same impact. She sat beside him and holds his hand. She was not sure what she should talk but she wanted to. So she started talking about the moments they spent together.

She kept talking and talking and while talking she realized the happy moments they spent together were far greater in number and bigger in size, than all the fights they had. A trip down memory lane and she was falling in love all over again with him. She was wishing that everything goes back to normal and she was ready to wait.

She decides that she will come daily. She will read newspaper to him, read his favorite novels, will tell him about the latest movies and songs.

She didn’t realize the time and when she saw it, it was 12. She had to get back to work. But she was happy and quite sure that everything will be back to normal again.

As she stood up and began to let go off his hand, she felt something. A gentle pressure on her palm. She didn’t believe it. She tried to brush it off as her imagination, but she couldn’t help but notice. Soon she saw the little finger of his hand trying to hold her as if he didn’t wanted her to leave.

The graphs showed some activity. She was shocked and called out to the doctor. Suddenly the activity became quite unusual with his heartbeat and blood pressure all on the rise. The doctors and his team arrived and asked her to wait outside.

She could see the team at work from the mirror. The heartbeat just kept rising with readings crossing 250-260. It was time to pray.She prayed with dedication.

After a while , things seemed normal. She felt good. It seemed like a ray of hope to her. But the heartbeat was too low 90….80…70…and further more. It was a matter of time that she realized that’s it was all over. The doctors came out of the room. The nurses removed all the gadgets. It was all over. She didn’t want to believe that. She was still standing there, not able to understand the turn of events that just took place. She fell in love again only to loose him again, but this time forever.

She walked out of the hospital with guilt. It was her touch that brought him back to life and vice versa. She felt responsible for his death. She was not sure if it was a good decision to see him at all

Friday, February 6, 2009

Talent Hunt

Today I was watching Russell Peter’s ' Black, Brown and white'. Russell peter is a famous stand up comedian of Indian origin , born and brought up in Canada and quite famous for his racist jokes. So in his show he got a piece where he mock Indian parents about how they ask their child to perform in front of guest. After seeing that memory flashed, scenes reappeared and I was thinking about my childhood. In those days I used to be a “break dancer” which I now realize was nothing more than “govinda dance” but I preferred to call it a break dance. And most of my dances were used to be on the govinda numbers only which if I think today, sound so embarrassing.

Damn it!!

Anyways I used to be quite satisfied after my live performance in front of that poor guest and their formal gesture of applauds which were like a Wimbledon trophy for me in those days. But with the time, I realized the condition of those poor guests and luckily my “break dancing talent” got replaced with my “stand up comedy” talent. Today when I remember those moments I rally feel sorry for the unlucky guests and I really thank them all for their rounds of applauds which are still like trophies for me.
But for all you people,
you can run ,
you can hide,
but you cant escape my PJs. [:)]